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Archive for the ‘Satire’ Category

Stockwatch: Groucho Marx Disguises (GMD)

Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 11 - 2012

Groucho Marx Disguises (GMD)

$47.05 (-.61) (-1.3%) The company’s value plummeted after the unveiling of a newly retooled disguise featuring no mustache, an average-sized nose, and, in the place of this black glasses, stylish wire frames.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/theonion/daily/~3/KQHImRbAe00/

The 8 Most Incredible Things Slapped Together in a Day

Posted by KrazyMan Knievel On April - 10 - 2012

It’s time again for everyone who hasn’t filed their taxes to start freaking out about how much work they’ve left to the last minute. Fortunately, people have been up against much more uncomfortable walls with much less time to spare. And they’ve done some pretty mind-blowing things …

#8. Macedonia Plants 6 Million Trees in One Day

Getty

Of all the troubling statistics that hippies shout at us as we pretend to be on our phone to avoid signing their petitions, the ones about how much rain forest is cut or burned down each day are always some of the most troubling. In 2008, after two summers of wildfires laid waste to their forests, the citizens of Macedonia didn’t need anyone to tell them their forests were in trouble. And so they decided to put all those trees back … in one day. The simplistic plan must have been the laughingstock of the green movement. Everyone knows you have to get Bono to attend one of your parties before your nonprofit is taken seriously.

Getty
“Remember to budget the $300 per hour for the lady who points at the word ‘strategy’ all day.”

Not realizing that they hadn’t done any of that, on November 19, 2008, the citizens of Macedonia got together and planted a total of 6 million trees — three trees for every human in the country. Thousands of people were bused around the country to planting sites. “Just as we take care of our homes, we should take care of our planet,” said one of the citizens who took part in the planting, and then “I don’t know what you’re talking about” when asked which ad agency had come up with that slogan.

By the way, here’s how big Macedonia is compared to a chunk of the United States:

IfItWereMyHome.com

The next year, when the fires took their toll again, Macedonians had another planting day, where they put down another 6 million trees. They did it again last year, when they put down 7 million. By November 2011, they had planted 44 million new trees (with only two days of planting a year).

Getty
Macedonia: Now buried beneath three layers of trees.

In addition to helping out their homeland, the organizers were hoping to send the world a message about how much you can do to fight global warming if you put just a little effort into it. You have to admit that a tiny country of 2 million people planting 6 million trees in a single day makes that point a lot better than some hippie shaming you with buzzwords.

#7. George Washington Builds a Frozen City in the Night Like It Ain’t a Thing

Getty

One of the key battles of the Revolutionary War was won not by fighting but by pushing a lot of heavy things around in the middle of the night. George Washington’s army was moving on British-occupied Boston, but with the British well-defended and able to see them coming, they needed some kind of edge.


Well, yes, this is obvious to us now, but remember that they had much smaller brains back then.

Washington went with what we will call the “instant fort” plan, where the British would go to bed to an empty hillside and wake up in the shadow of a fortified bank of cannons pointing down at them. This involved sneaking over 60 cannons up a hill right in front of the town, as well as all the materials for fortifications.

On March 4, 1776, they wrapped their wagon wheels with straw to deaden the sound, put hay bales between whatever they were moving and the city and did the impossible, just like Washington asked.

Getty
Stealth equipment in the 1700s was not as cool-looking as it is today.

By morning, there was an impressive fortification staring down on the city, stirring British general William Howe to say, “The rebels have done more in one night than my whole army would have done in a month.” Which implies that either the Revolutionary Army had accomplished an extraordinary feat or that the British Army was mostly worthless.

Howe’s first plan was to attack, but a sudden storm gave him some time to think about it, as well as giving Washington some time to keep building his fortifications. By the time the storm cleared up, Washington’s instant fort was impressive enough that Howe decided to head out. Washington had basically managed to take a city with the military equivalent of flexing his muscles.

Ihric
“You think this is nonchalant? I can get at least 15 percent more nonchalant than this.”

#6. Empty Lot of Land Becomes Guthrie, Oklahoma, in One Day

April 22, 1889 marked the astonishing one-day transformation of an empty expanse of prairie land into a town of 10,000, all between noon and sundown. It also marked the last time anyone was anxious to get into Oklahoma.

You see, due to a perfect conjunction of laws and stealing land from Indians, there was suddenly a ton of free land to be had in Oklahoma for anyone who could get there and put a tent on it first. But the law said that nobody could cross the border until noon on April 22 for some reason. In the days prior to the 22nd, hordes of land-hungry carpetbaggers began to pile up on the border, waiting to pour through the gates like Walmart shoppers on Black Friday.

Getty
Like this, only with a lot more horse carts and dysentery.

Unlike Black Friday, there aren’t any records of anyone being trampled to death, but there were quite a few people illegally camping out inside the territory, which is basically like going into Walmart the day before Thanksgiving and hiding yourself in a display of Pepsi cans, and then popping out at 4 a.m. on Black Friday and shouting, “First!”

These people were called “sooners,” and Oklahomans are apparently proud of this behavior, because it’s their state nickname (the Sooner State) and the Oklahoma University team name.

John Silks via Wikimedia Commons
“Whoooo! We like cutting in line!”

When the clock struck noon on the 22nd, the crowds piled onto trains and went racing into the territory, many of them getting off at the first station — Guthrie — at 1:25 p.m., where they found a handful of sooners already staking their claims. Seeing that they weren’t the first to get there, and noticing that lots of the people on the train were as impatient as they were, the campers sprang into action, and the town went from 0 to 10,000 in the course of an afternoon. And since this was back when elbow grease was America’s number one export, tire axle lubricant and preferred soup base, the sudden citizens had already laid out the streets, staked out lots and started forming a government by the time midnight rolled around.

manataka
“Dibs on Minister of Rocking Out!”

Four months later, the town was pretty well built out, with the directory listing “six banks, 16 barbers, 16 blacksmiths, 17 carpenters, two cigar manufacturers, five newspapers, seven hardware stores, 15 hotels, 19 pharmacists, 22 lumber companies, 39 doctors, 40 restaurants” and, of course, 81 lawyers.

#5. U.S. Navy Delivers Aircraft-Carrier-Shaped Magic Trick

Wikipedia

In World War II’s Battle of the Coral Sea, the aircraft carrier USS Yorktown had a hole ripped through its flight deck by a Japanese bomb, which penetrated several decks and exploded inside the ship, killing or seriously injuring 66 men. Despite its gaping wound, the Yorktown was able to make it back to the Pearl Harbor naval yard for repairs, forever proving that the Titanic was a wimp.

U.S.Navy
“We’re going to need four, maybe five tubes of caulk.”

The bomb damage, plus all the other damage sustained in the battle, was expected to take three months to repair, although crews estimated that they could get her just barely patched up enough in two weeks to return to the U.S. mainland for serious repairs. Admiral Nimitz, channeling his best Captain Kirk, told them they had three days — and not just to get the ship limping back to the mainland, but to send her out to fight.

pacificwarmuseum
Soon after that order, his shirt ripped open.

Several sleepless days later, the USS Yorktown was on her way to Midway like a freaking magic trick. The sheer impossibility of the Yorktown being afloat, let alone ready to fight, led the Japanese to assume they must be looking at a new carrier. The Yorktown took down four Japanese carriers before doing what it did best and was shot to pieces. This time, the ship sank like a stone, but the Americans who went down with it had done their damage, and the battle where the U.S. Navy made Japan think they were being attacked by a freaking ghost ship ended up being one of the keys to turning the tide of the war. The battle put the Japanese behind in terms of ships and manpower, and they never caught up.

PopHistoryDig.com
The ragtag team of hot female mechanics that we like to imagine fixed the ship.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CrackedRSS/~3/Di6Z_wSjl68/article_19802_the-8-most-incredible-things-slapped-together-in-day.html

20 Scariest Celebrity Close-Ups

Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 10 - 2012


Published on Today 4/9/2012
under Misc
– by Beverly Jenkins
- 45,952 views


TAGS: celebrities, photography, paparazzi, close ups

Ready to feel better about yourself? Sure, celebrities look amazing on film and in magazines, but how do they look in unaltered, high-resolution photos? The hilarious Tumblr blog Celebrity Close-Up offers a fun and surprisingly scary look at your favorite celebrity’s pores and wrinkles. Here are twenty of our favorites!

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian
Kim should avoid open flames; she might melt.

Paula Deen

Paula Deen
The new face of Diabetes.

Hugh Laurie

Hugh Laurie
Housed.

Kathy Griffin

Kathy Griffin
GAH!

Vanessa Hudgens

Vanessa Hudgens
Might we suggest a good depilatory cream?

Jennifer Aniston

Jennifer Aniston
Jen has had about three nose jobs since this picture was taken. (Allegedly!)

Julia Roberts

Julia Roberts
Not-So-Pretty Woman.

Mel Gibson

Mel Gibson
He looks like a potato.

Celine Dion

Celine Dion
Her sideburns will go on….

Uma Thurman

Uma Thurman
Please tell us that’s make-up powder on her nose….

Britney Spears

Britney Spears
Toxic.

Mick Jagger

Mick Jagger
Don’t do drugs, kids.

Kelly Ripa

Kelly Ripa
Chiclet teeth?

Jeff Bridges

Jeff Bridges
I’d still hit it.

Kristen Chenowith

Kristen Chenowith
Bulging forehead veins are so hot.

Robert Downey, Jr.

Robert Downey, Jr.
OH HAI!

Vanessa Paradis

Vanessa Paradis
Don’t laugh – she landed Johnny Depp!

Kenny Rogers

Kenny Rogers
Worst facelift/eye job EVER.

Goldie Hawn

Goldie Hawn
Is that a glob of mascara on her eyeball?

Will Ferrell

Will Ferrell
Rocking the razor burn.

See more at Celebrity Close-Ups!

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19 Secret Inspirations for Famous Song Lyrics

Posted by KrazyMan Knievel On April - 9 - 2012

There are plenty of song lyrics that make you wonder what the hell was going on in the room when they were written. We asked you to use the magic of image manipulation to show us. The winner is below, but first the runners up …

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Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CrackedRSS/~3/FG4-3ehyGhA/

Unsung Heroes: Esther Hatcher

Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 9 - 2012

Esther Hatcher

Esther Hatcher ate an entire box of her roommate’s cookies and replaced them after her roommate noticed and got mad.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/theonion/daily/~3/w111EJk3wV8/

Showdown at the Hipster Saloon

Posted by KrazyMan Knievel On April - 8 - 2012

Popularity: 1% [?]

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CrackedRSS/~3/un1JBYGHhmM/video_18406_showdown-at-hipster-saloon.html

10 Wackiest Rings

Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 8 - 2012


Published on Today 4/7/2012
under Cool Objects
– by Gracie Murano

Blinking Eyeball Rings

Blinking Eyeball Rings
These PYGMY robot rings were developed at Keio University in Japan. They blink according to different settings, including voice recognition, finger activity and remote control. They are, sadly, not yet on the market.
(Link | Via)

Food Sculpture Ring

Food Sculpture Ring
Etsy seller SouZou Creations makes fancy elaborate meals very portable. Her tiny polymer clay food sculptures slip right onto your fingers. Several of her works, including this steak platter, include elements that appear to be suspended in midair.
(Link | Via)

Space Invaders Pixel Ring

Space Invaders Pixel Ring
Inspired by the iconic video game Space Invaders, this little digital robot is made up of white pixels. It is gold-plated and hand-enameled. An icon of a generation of gamers, geeks, but also street art fans, this space invader ring will add an edgy and stylish touch to your outfit.
(Link | Via)

Shish Kabob Ring

Shish Kabob Ring
Looks delicious.
(Link)

Steampunk Telescope Ring

Steampunk Telescope Ring
This cast metal ring is made of lightweight aluminum with an aged bronze finish. The ring itself is a conversation starter, but when you start showing off the features, that’s when you’ll become the belle/beau of the steampunk ball. The two lenses fold out and then slide apart, forming a small telescope. Prefer to examine things closer? The large lens doubles as a magnifying glass. This amazing contraption comes in a tin suitable for giving to that person in your life who loves classy gadgets and the color brown.
(Buy it Here | Via)

Pac-Man Ring

Pac-Man Ring
Simple and obvious, yet completely brilliant. While they are currently sold out, I hope NAMCO is getting a licensing fee. The company is struggling, and I’d hate to see one of the few remaining old-school game companies go under.
(Via)

Tap Ring

Tap Ring
Creative tap ring by Portuguese product designer, Alessandro Beda. What do you prefer, hot or cold?
(Link)

Finger Ring

Finger Ring
As a kid, did you ever have those plastic fingertips that let you pretend you had long, red nails? This finger ring by Delfina Delettrez kind of reminds us of that. Except this is the version for rich kids. Or something. The silver accessory also has a customizable element – it comes with a bottle of nail polish, or you can paint your own color on to the nail. Red! Pink! Glitter!
(Link | Via)

Beer Ring

Beer Ring
Kawaii Cute Japanese Beer Ring by SouZouCreations on Etsy. One of many amazing, gravity-defying rings from this seller.
(Link)

Button Ring

Button Ring
Looking for a slightly weird, very crafty and kinda cute present? Enroll someone you love in the Button Ring of the Month Club. Best of all, the rings are somewhat customized to your personal preferences. Only $55 for a 6 month membership full of accessories galore!
(Link | Via)

freakin’ awesome sushi plate style ring
by hoving on Today 4/7/2012
0 votes
This adorable tiny platter consists of 3 maki sushi and 2 nigiri sushi.
It is lightweight, so much(…)

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10 Wackiest Rings

Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 8 - 2012


Published on Today 4/7/2012
under Cool Objects
– by Gracie Murano

Blinking Eyeball Rings

Blinking Eyeball Rings
These PYGMY robot rings were developed at Keio University in Japan. They blink according to different settings, including voice recognition, finger activity and remote control. They are, sadly, not yet on the market.
(Link | Via)

Food Sculpture Ring

Food Sculpture Ring
Etsy seller SouZou Creations makes fancy elaborate meals very portable. Her tiny polymer clay food sculptures slip right onto your fingers. Several of her works, including this steak platter, include elements that appear to be suspended in midair.
(Link | Via)

Space Invaders Pixel Ring

Space Invaders Pixel Ring
Inspired by the iconic video game Space Invaders, this little digital robot is made up of white pixels. It is gold-plated and hand-enameled. An icon of a generation of gamers, geeks, but also street art fans, this space invader ring will add an edgy and stylish touch to your outfit.
(Link | Via)

Shish Kabob Ring

Shish Kabob Ring
Looks delicious.
(Link)

Steampunk Telescope Ring

Steampunk Telescope Ring
This cast metal ring is made of lightweight aluminum with an aged bronze finish. The ring itself is a conversation starter, but when you start showing off the features, that’s when you’ll become the belle/beau of the steampunk ball. The two lenses fold out and then slide apart, forming a small telescope. Prefer to examine things closer? The large lens doubles as a magnifying glass. This amazing contraption comes in a tin suitable for giving to that person in your life who loves classy gadgets and the color brown.
(Buy it Here | Via)

Pac-Man Ring

Pac-Man Ring
Simple and obvious, yet completely brilliant. While they are currently sold out, I hope NAMCO is getting a licensing fee. The company is struggling, and I’d hate to see one of the few remaining old-school game companies go under.
(Via)

Tap Ring

Tap Ring
Creative tap ring by Portuguese product designer, Alessandro Beda. What do you prefer, hot or cold?
(Link)

Finger Ring

Finger Ring
As a kid, did you ever have those plastic fingertips that let you pretend you had long, red nails? This finger ring by Delfina Delettrez kind of reminds us of that. Except this is the version for rich kids. Or something. The silver accessory also has a customizable element – it comes with a bottle of nail polish, or you can paint your own color on to the nail. Red! Pink! Glitter!
(Link | Via)

Beer Ring

Beer Ring
Kawaii Cute Japanese Beer Ring by SouZouCreations on Etsy. One of many amazing, gravity-defying rings from this seller.
(Link)

Button Ring

Button Ring
Looking for a slightly weird, very crafty and kinda cute present? Enroll someone you love in the Button Ring of the Month Club. Best of all, the rings are somewhat customized to your personal preferences. Only $55 for a 6 month membership full of accessories galore!
(Link | Via)

freakin’ awesome sushi plate style ring
by hoving on Today 4/7/2012
0 votes
This adorable tiny platter consists of 3 maki sushi and 2 nigiri sushi.
It is lightweight, so much(…)

(Source)Have a great addition to the article? Contribute!

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provided by: and
The Best Of Jesus Christ (Official)

10 Careers For Lizards

18 People Who Will Never Get Out Of The Friend Zone

Pet Alligator Seized From Home With Infant, Dog

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Popularity: 1% [?]

Article source: http://www.oddee.com/item_98130.aspx

LEXINGTON, KY—As part of an investigation into possible rules violations, NCAA officials visited Kentucky’s basketball facility following its championship win this week, but found no trace of notorious head coach John Calipari, whose messy office appeared to have been hastily and recently abandoned. “Slipped through our fingers again,” said lead investigator Michael Huber, who found clipboards scattered on the floor and open file cabinet drawers that appeared to have been hurriedly emptied. ”By now, this guy’s probably a thousand miles away, running his scheme on yet another team. We can vacate what he did here, but we’ll probably never catch him in the act.” The only person inside the building, a janitor cleaning the halls, told investigators he had never heard of Calipari and seemed to believe the facility was used by the University of Kentucky’s art history department.

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Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/theonion/daily/~3/WSc-Wz2mbWo/

23 Modern Images as Misunderstood by Future Acheologists

Posted by KrazyMan Knievel On April - 7 - 2012

Did you know Napoleon’s height was exactly average for his time? His enemies made up the short thing to make him look silly, and it stuck because he looked sort of small in a couple of paintings. Guy nearly conquered the modern world, and yet when we hear his name today, our first thought is “short guy who’s got a short fuse about being such a shorty pants.”

This made us wonder how the images we leave behind will be misremembered. We asked you to show us and the winner of the $50 prize is below, but first the runners up …

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Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CrackedRSS/~3/2KWIUxbQ-7s/

3 Tips for Spicing Up Your Sexless Relationship

Posted by KrazyMan Knievel On April - 6 - 2012

  • Best of this series, by far. So many excellent moments, of which I particularly enjoyed “…try some steamy roleplay, what, what” and “I didn’t think there were any!”
    Loved the Rick and Ashley transition.
    Plus, Doctor Cone can really pull off that little pink number. Thanks for that. ;)

    Reply


    1. i agree. he must work out.

  • Popularity: 1% [?]

    Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CrackedRSS/~3/T48o67XQMMA/video_18393_3-tips-spicing-up-your-sexless-relationship.html

    7 Incredible ‘Words With Friends’ Stories

    Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 6 - 2012


    Published on 3/25/2012
    under Fun Tech
    – by Beverly Jenkins
    - 68,585 views


    TAGS: love, Zynga, Words With Friends, games

    These days, it’s hard to find someone who is not addicted to playing Words With Friends. This crossword-style game is similar to Scrabble and is played online via Facebook, as well as on mobile phones using their downloadable app.

    According to Zynga, the maker of this game, more and more users are not only having a great time showcasing their word-building skills, but they’re also using it as a tool to find love, flirt, and even cheat on their mates. According to this article, one in every ten players say WWF has lead directly to a hookup, 35% say they’ve let their crush win, and almost half (47%) of all players say they’ve got a crush on an opponent.

    Matchmaking aside, Words With Friends has also been at the center of a celebrity controversy and has helped save at least one life. Read on to discover seven amazing stories brought about by a simple word game!

    They Found Love On Another Continent

    They Found Love On Another Continent
    This is one of the first WWF games that actually lead to marriage! Megan Lawless and Jasper Jasperse met using the “random opponent” feature of the game, and soon a few messages here and there turned into a major romance. Jasperse even moved from his home in the Netherlands to be with Lawless in the U.S.
    (Link | Photo)

    Alec Baldwin gets kicked off an airplane

    Alec Baldwin gets kicked off an airplane
    On an American Airlines flight from Los Angeles to New York, Hollywood actor Alec Baldwin was playing WWF on his iPad when flight attendants asked him to turn off his mobile device in preparation for takeoff. When Baldwin refused, he was asked to leave the flight.

    An outraged Baldwin then tweeted about his experience: “Flight attendant on American reamed me out 4 playing WORDS W FRIENDS while we sat at the gate, not moving. #nowonderamericaairisbankrupt,”
    (Link | Photo)

    Can you spell L-U-C-K-Y?

    Can you spell L-U-C-K-Y?
    In January of 2012, Beth Legler started a game with Georgie and Simon Fletcher from Queensland, Australia. One day, Simon wasn’t feeling well, so Georgie mentioned his symptoms to Beth using the game’s messaging feature. Beth told her husband Larry, who happens to be a doctor, and he told her to have Simon seek urgent medical help right away.

    Turns out, Simon was having a heart attack. Once he went to the hospital he found that he had a 99% blockage near his heart, and if he hadn’t gone to the hospital right then, he would have died.
    (Link | Photo)

    Flirting For the Win!

    Flirting For the Win!
    According to The Wall Street Journal, “I was just curious to get to know the person I was playing,” says Ms. Palmer, a 41-year-old nurse. Her competitor mentioned having two kids and being divorced. Ms. Palmer, too, was also going through a divorce. Both had been married 18 years, and a message relationship began to flourish inside the game. They swapped emails and phone numbers, and matters progressed.

    After dating for two years, the couple got married.
    (ViaPhoto)

    Kate Couric Challenges Fans

    Kate Couric Challenges Fans
    NBC News Anchor Katie Couric aims to use the game to raise money for cancer research. She recently Tweeted, “I will challenge the first 10 ppl who respond to me to a words with friends game! If I lose, I donate $1000 to @SU2C and if u lose u donate $25, $50 or whatever amount you can!”

    @SU2C stands for “Stand Up To Cancer.”
    (Link | Photo)

    From Random Opponent to Perfect Match

    From Random Opponent to Perfect Match
    When Kyla Smith spelled S-E-X-Y against a random opponent in a WWF game, she started a conversation that eventually won her a husband! Her opponent was Charles Briggs, and despite the fact that they lived in different parts of the U.S., their online romance eventually became a real-life love affair. They’re now engaged.
    (Link | Photo)

    He Even Proposed on WWF

    He Even Proposed on WWF
    Stephen Monahan and Britney Hilbun met using the “random opponent” feature. Hilbun sent Stephen a message about his funny user name (“Hotdog Phingers!”), and then they started flirting. They soon learned that they lived just three hours away from each other in Texas.

    After dating for a while, Stephen proposed to Britney by creating a fake WWF board that spelled out “Britney, will you marry me?” She said yes!
    (Link | Photo)

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    8 Truly Bizarre Sleep Disorders

    Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 6 - 2012


    Published on 3/27/2012
    under Bizarre Medical Stories
    – by Gracie Murano
    - 98,288 views

    Sleeping Beauty Syndrome: the girl who sleeps for ten days at a run

    Sleeping Beauty Syndrome: the girl who sleeps for ten days at a run
    When 15-year-old Louisa Ball takes a nap, she doesn’t mess around. She sleeps for days on end, and no amount of shaking or prodding can fully wake her up. The British girl has a rare condition called Sleeping Beauty Sickness, but there’s no Prince Charming on the way to rescue her. Doctors don’t know what causes it or how to cure it — only that it strikes teenagers and goes away by itself after 8 to 12 years.

    She was eventually diagnosed with Kleine-Levin Syndrome, whose victims worldwide may number no more than 1,000. The victims live normally for weeks or months at a time, with normal sleep patterns and normal energy levels. Then, with little warning, they’ll go to sleep for days or weeks at a time. So far, Louisa’s longest bout in bed has been 13 days. Victims will wake briefly, but be disoriented and not fully alert. Louisa’s parents force her awake so she can use the bathroom and eat.
    (Link)

    Sexsomnia: the woman who has all night sex while asleep

    Sexsomnia: the woman who has all night sex while asleep
    Worn-out Haley Batty, 23, is suffering from an amazing sleeping sickness that really does keep her boyfriends up all night. This medical condition means she can’t help pestering them for sex from bedtime ’till dawn. But she’s ASLEEP all the time—and never remembers a thing in the morning.

    The medical condition sexomnia makes Haley Batty demand sex while she’s asleep. Haley’s been dumped by a string of men who got the hump when they asked, “Was it good for you, too?” only to get the response, “Eh?” because she’d been unconscious all night. She sighs, “I can have sex three or four times a night if the guys have the stamina, but in the morning I won’t know anything about it.”

    Sexsomnia, or sleep sex, is a sleep disorder, where people have sex while they’re sleeping without realizing it! Most times, they can’t remember anything that happened, and because they’re unaware that this is a medical condition, they don’t seek professional help. According to a study, sexsomnia affects 11% of male and 4% of women.

    On August 8, 2007, a British RAF mechanic was cleared of a rape charge after the jury found him not responsible for his actions when he had sex with a 15-year-old girl.
    (Link | Via)

    Non-24-Hour Sleep Disorder: people who have constant jet-lag

    Non-24-Hour Sleep Disorder:  people who have constant jet-lag
    When it comes to sleeping disorders, none of them are as strange and difficult to treat as the non-24-hour sleep-wake disorder. People affected by this disorder have internal body clocks which refuse to acknowledge the standard 24-hour cycle of a day and therefore do not necessarily associate night with sleep, and day with being awake. (For example, a person whose natural internal body clock was 28 hours long would seek sleep at intervals four hours later each day, incrementally, than typical people would.) Most interestingly, while Non-24 affects both blind people and sighted ones, it is very prevalent in blind people who do lack light sensitivity, suggesting that our body clocks are a function of the Earth’s rotation.
    (Link)

    Narcolepsy: people who fall asleep suddenly during regular activities

    Narcolepsy: people who fall asleep suddenly during regular activities
    Perhaps one of the best known, and yet still weird, sleep disorders is narcolepsy, which has a tendency to put people to sleep unexpectedly while they are engaged in normal, everyday activities, such as driving, jogging or washing dishes.

    Narcolepsy is a neurological sleep disorder that is commonly associated with falling asleep at random times. Narcoleptics tend to fall directly into REM sleep, when most dreaming occurs, and less commonly enter deeper and more restful stages of non-REM sleep. As a result, they are unable to stay awake for extended periods of time, and upon falling back asleep, they still are unable to experience sleep’s more restorative stages, causing a vicious cycle of extreme sleepiness and inability to stay awake after having slept. Another symptom can include cataplexy, the sudden collapse of an individual into REM sleep upon experiencing strong emotions. Sleep paralysis and hypnogogic hallucinations (hallucinations which accompany sleep paralysis) are also known to be symptoms. The cause of narcolepsy has not been determined. It is widely believed to be an autoimmune disorder, but it may also be genetic. Treatments include stimulants, anti-depressants, or hypnotic medications such as Xyrem.
    (Link)

    Cataplexy: the woman who falls asleep every time she laughs

    Cataplexy: the woman who falls asleep every time she laughs
    Claire Scott has a rare disorder which means that when she gets an attack of the giggles she falls over and blacks out. This mother of two suffers cataplexy – a rare sleep disorder that makes her pass out whenever she gets the giggles.

    She said, “The other week, my little girl told me a joke she’d made up at school. It didn’t even make sense but I burst out laughing. The next thing I knew, my husband was picking me up off the kitchen floor.” Mrs Scott, from Jersey, Channel Islands, has always had the condition but was only diagnosed recently. The 24-year-old added, “Sometimes, I am aware before it happens – other times I completely black out and I’m left paralyzed. Once, I collapsed while walking through the middle of a high street. People do look at you strangely when it happens. It’s really embarrassing.”

    The rare disorder that Mrs. Scott suffers from is said to affect 5 people in 10,000. Cataplexy sufferers can experience a sudden and temporary episode of loss of muscle tone, often triggered by emotions.
    (Link)

    Somnambulistic Eating: the woman who gained over 60 pounds while sleeping

    Somnambulistic Eating: the woman who gained over 60 pounds while sleeping
    Nocturnal Sleep-Related Eating Disorder (NSRED), also known as Sleep-Related Eating disorder (SRED), sleep eating, or somnambulistic eating, is a combination of a parasomnia and an eating disorder.

    According to doctors and psychiatrists, NSRED is closely related to Night Eating Syndrome (NES) except for the fact that those suffering from NES are completely awake and aware of their eating and bingeing at night, while those suffering from NSRED are sleeping and unaware of what they are doing. During the handling of this food, patients with NSRED distinguish themselves, as they are usually messy or harmful to themselves. Some eat their food with their bare hands while others attempt to eat it with utensils. This occasionally results in injuries to the person as well as other injuries.

    Patient Anna Ryan didn’t even know that she was suffering from NSRED for a year-and-a-half and that she gained over 60 pounds (27kg) during that time. Anna first noticed that something was wrong when she felt exhausted during the day even after she had gotten what she thought was a good night’s rest. Anna decided to go talk to her doctor, Scott Eveloff, about her lack of energy, and he suggested that she participate in a sleep study. When Anna participated in such a prescribed study, she discovered that she was up most nights and eating while sleeping.
    (Link)

    Sudden Unexpected Nocturnal Death syndrome: healthy men who go to bed and never wake up

    Sudden Unexpected Nocturnal Death syndrome: healthy men who go to bed and never wake up
    Almost everyone wants to go peacefully in their sleep, but the situation seen in cases of Sudden Unexpected Death Syndrome probably isn’t quite what they meant. With this sleep disorder, healthy, happy young men go to sleep one night… and never wake up. The situation is on a clear parallel with sudden infant death, which is seen in babies, everywhere; the only difference is that victims of this variety are older, male and most often found in Southeast Asian countries.

    It is believed that the victims’ hearts simply skip a beat and never start up again. Lacking a more thorough explanation, some make up their own: in Laos, some believe an evil spirit is to blame. This spirit, taking on the persona of a spurned woman, lashes out against the opposite sex. This belief has even inspired some men to cross-dress their nights away, sleeping in women’s clothing to remain undetected. Elsewhere, some believe that consuming too many carbs is the culprit.
    (Link)

    Sleep Paralysis: people who become immobile even after they are awake

    Sleep Paralysis: people who become immobile even after they are awake
    During REM sleep, dream activity revs up and the voluntary muscles of the body become immobile. This temporary paralysis keeps us from acting out our dreams and hurting ourselves. Sometimes, though, the paralysis persists even after the person wakes up. “You know you’re awake and you want to move,” Kline said, “but you just can’t.”

    Even worse, sleep paralysis often coincides with hallucinations. In one 1999 study published in the Journal of Sleep Research, 75 percent of college students who’d experienced sleep paralysis reported simultaneous hallucinations. And these hallucinations, when they occur with sleep paralysis, are no picnic; people commonly report sensing an evil presence, along with a feeling of being crushed or choked. That sensation has given sleep paralysis a place in folklore worldwide. Newfoundlanders know it as the “Old Hag.” In China, it’s the “ghost pressing down on you.” And in Mexico, it’s known as the idiom “subirse el muerto,” or “the dead climb on top of you.” Even today, some researchers suspect that tales of alien abduction may be explained by episodes of sleep paralysis.
    (Link)

    Fatal familial insomnia
    by Paris on 4/3/2012
    0 votes
    Yikes!Fatal familial insomnia (FFI) is a very rare autosomal dominant inherited prion disease of the(…)
    (Source)Exploding Head Syndrome
    by enkor on 3/27/2012
    5 votes
    Exploding head syndrome is a parasomnia condition that causes the sufferer occasionally to experienc(…)
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    12 Shocking Pictures of Children With Dangerous Pets

    Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 6 - 2012


    Published on 3/29/2012
    under Misc
    – by Gracie Murano
    - 74,806 views


    ()


    Taking a bath.
    ()


    It’s almost like riding a horse.
    ()


    1920′s. Doreen taking an alligator ride.


    (Link)


    Tippi Hedren, her pet lion, her daughter Melanie Griffith, 1971
    (Link)


    Baby with ferrets.

    NOTE: While ferrets may look dangerous, they can make great pets for the right owner. They are affectionate and bond to their owners, and there are few pets as playful as ferrets (yet they are quiet for a large portion of the day). They seem to have garnered a negative image in some places, which is largely undeserved.
    (Link)


    Although this girl seems to be doing just fine riding this ostrich, ostriches are known to be rather aggressive and their powerful kicks have been deadly. They’re also fast runners, which doesn’t help if you’re being chased.
    (Link)


    Note: thanks to our readers for letting us know that this scary Komodo Dragon is only a statue.

    Olivia Bonfield on ‘America’s Got Talent’ show
    by Max Jade on 3/29/2012
    3 votes
    Check out the provided video of this little girl, she’s absolutely AMAZING.
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    12 Totally Bizarre Earrings

    Posted by Cha Cha Brown On April - 6 - 2012


    Published on 3/31/2012
    under Cool Objects
    – by Gracie Murano
    - 56,031 views


    Ok, we just had to start this list with these earrings. I know everybody loves Chuck Norris, but wearing him in your ears?

    A supporter of U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) was caught wearing Chuck Norris earrings during a campaign event at the Searchlight Nugget Casino in Searchlight, Nevada.
    (Link | Via)


    How about wearing an ear in your ears?
    (Link)


    Dead mice. This is one creepy piece of jewelry I know I’ll never use.


    With the proper hair arrangement, this cool design by Marco Rigovacca looks like someone has driven a spike through her ear. There’s actually a thin gold loop that connects the two segments of the “Javelin” earring.
    (Link | Via)


    Creepy snake eye earring.
    (Link)


    Got Swine Flu? Feeling a little under-the-weather? I have just the thing… These earrings may not CURE the common cold, but they’re guaranteed to make you feel at least a teensy-tiny bit better! Little bitty blue white bowls contain a hearty dose of cold remedy: noodles, bits of chicken, carrots, and celery in broth. Served on an oval plate slightly larger than a quarter, with 3 little saltine crackers. Note: These would make a great gift for your sister who has mono, your best friend who just caught the flu, or anyone who’s feeling out of sorts and needs a whimsical little lift!
    (Link | Via)


    Slit throat choker with blood drop earrings, this is a combination that Edward would love.
    (Link)


    Tiny folding knife earrings: You would look “sharp” in these.
    (Link | Via)


    Custom designed earrings made from Ken doll heads and hands. Very unique, fun, funky, and a tiny bit creepy.
    (Link)


    Something about wearing body parts as jewelry doesn’t strike me as fashionable nor stylish; it strikes me as “Serial Killer-y” and that look is so last season.
    (Link)


    Gummy Candies Jar Earrings.
    (Via)


    Etsy seller Elizabeth Kohn made a set of earrings that look like the piranha plants from Super Mario Bros. Ouch! Hopefully these don’t spit fireballs.
    (Link | Via)

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    by ntaka on 4/2/2012
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    Penis Earrings
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    2 votes
    Realistic Penis Earrings!
    (Source)Awesome sushi platter earrings!
    by Hans Klokkenspel on 3/31/2012
    9 votes
    Etsy shop full of cute nerdy jewelry! (http://www.etsy.com/shop/tanteJiska/)
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