Afro-Squad Magazine

Check out this week’s BOTW, Jessie Belle! Jessie is an independent pro wrestler hoping to make it into TNA or the WWE. This s#xy lassie is reportedly now a McCoy, from the famous Hatfield-feuding family. These pictures were taken by www.Wrestling911.com, so please check out their site!

Popularity: 5% [?]

Kim Kardashian’s ass is one of our favorite topics here at www.afro-squad.com. We invite you to check out our favorite pictures of her bottom!

Popularity: 15% [?]

Back in 2001 we posted eight women and officially dedicated them our “All American Girls.”  We went into our hard drive and found their pictures.  (Two have since asked to have their photos not show up online, so we omitted them.)  Anyway, if you here are a few photos from back in the day!  Check out the American Girls!

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http://real-aliens.awardspace.com/

Here is the latest entry in our weekly “Worst of the Web” column.  It is a site titled “Real Aliens and UFO.”  Here is a sample of the page:

Welcome to the biggest website dedicated to one question: Are aliens real?
You will find here lots of information about:
Alien abduction, Extraterrestrial life, Roswell incident, Ufo sightings, Crop circles, Conspiracy theories, Paranormal phenomenons and other Aliens proofs such as pictures, footages and videos. The real aliens website is on its early stages, Currently there are over 100 aliens pages here and still growing !

“Mommy, are aliens real?”
“No, Tommy.” Jessica pinned the next sheet to the clothes line. “Aliens aren’t real. They’re something made-up, make-belief like you see on Mister Dressup. They’re monsters that were made to scare the adults.”

“I saw aliens on the X-Files.” Tommy sauntered through the wind-pulled sheets. “They were small and grey all over. They had no hair and they had big black eyes like a big bug.” He whizzed his toy spaceship through the air, between and around the wet sheets.

“The X-Files is a television show, Tommy,” Jessica reminded. She whipped the creases out of another sheet. “It’s something called science-fiction, which is another phrase for make-belief.”

“But what about Cancerman!” Tommy protested. “He looked just like the old man who lives next door–and he worked for the government!” Jessica smiled and shook her head. “It’s all pretend, Tommy. It’s all pretend. The universe is a big, big place–but it’s impossible to cross all that space.”

Tommy frowned. “Whatever. I’m going to Eric’s house.” “Okay, Tommy.” Jessica clapped her hands together. “But be back before dinner! We’re having spinach and carrots and potatoes.” Tommy went to Eric’s house with a disgusted look on his face.

Jessica smiled to herself. “Kids will be kids,” she said. She pinned the last sheet to the clothes line and went inside to signal the mother ship.

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Special agent Cleopatra Jones (Tamara Dobson), six feet two inches of sinewy fighting fury clad in layers of runway chic fashions in bright rainbow colors, strolls up a sand dune and orders the destruction of a Turkish poppy field. Thousands of miles away, an L.A. drug lord named Mommy (Shelley Winters hamming it up with garish wigs and lecherous leers) screeches as her life blood burns away and lures Cleopatra stateside to plot her demise. A product of the “Ethinically Significant” explosion of low-budget thrillers featuring black heroes in the 1970s, Cleopatra Jones may not be the best of the batch but revels in the most outrageous fashion sense. Cleo looks great in furs, pantsuits, ponchos, turbans–a new outfit every scene–and drives a sleek black Corvette with a personalized license plate: “CLEO.” It’s a shame that the producers dropped the exotic potential of a globetrotting super-agent for an L.A.-bound gangster film, which is entertaining in a comic-book way but rarely reaches the energetic levels of the gritty Pam Grier action pictures Coffy and Foxy Brown. Bernie Casey is a role model of dignity and action as a neighborhood activist, and a garishly overdressed Antonio Fargas delivers a suitably flamboyant performance as Mommy’s pusher Doodlebug. The glamorous super-agent flew off to Hong Kong for the 1975 sequel, Cleopatra Jones and the Casino of Gold. –Sean Axmaker

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Check out these HOT images of Angelina Valentine, The Classy Lady of the Week for 6/12/2011

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The film opens with a credit sequence depicting Shaft, a private detective, emerging from the New York City subway and walking through Times Square, with scenes characterizing early 1970s New York. Shaft visits a shoeshine parlor, and is informed that some gangsters are looking for him. Police Lt. Vic Androzzi meets Shaft outside the parlor; and tries to get information from him on the two gangsters, but without any success. After Lt. Androzzi leaves, Shaft spots one of the men waiting for him in his office building. He command’s the first gangster, forcing him into his office where the second gangster is waiting. After a quick fight, Shaft throws one of them out the window; while the other surrenders and reveals to him that Bumpy, the leader of an uptown gang, wanted to meet Shaft and knock him out at his office.

At the police station, Shaft lies to Lt. Androzzi and his superior about the fight by saying that his friend got into an “accident”. He is allowed to return to the streets for 48 hours. Shaft arranges a meeting with Bumpy, the leader of these gangsters, in his office. It turns out Bumpy’s daughter has been kidnapped, and Shaft is asked to get her back safe. Shaft starts his investigation by looking for a man named Ben Buford, who is revealed to have been part of “the movement” with Shaft years ago, and eventually finds out that Ben’s group is holding a meeting. Shaft then returns home to his girlfriend where they make love.

The evening of the meeting, Shaft is tailed by a fingerman to the meeting where an ambush ensures. Shaft and Ben escape from the carnage while Ben’s group and the fingerman are murdered by unknown assailants. Ben confronts Shaft, thinking he was set up, but they refrain from fighting and move on.

Shaft is told by Vic after the shooting that Shaft himself was the target, not Ben, and that there are brewing tensions between the “uptown” hoods belonging to Bumpy Jonas and the “downtown” Mafioso, that have culminated in a couple of murders. Vic states those who know, know it’s “hood against hood” on the inside, but the perception is black against white to the general public, with the possibility of things escalating into full-blown race war on the streets of the city. He also shows Shaft some pictures of two of the Mafioso men who just got to New York. Vic pleads to Shaft to just clue him in to what’s going on, though Vic already knew Bumpy was looking for Shaft.

Shaft and Ben later meet Bumpy at his uptown office where Shaft ups the price for the job, based on his new-found information from Vic. Bumpy states that the reason for turning him on to Ben’s is because Shaft is going to need an army to get his daughter back, and “Ben’s got one,” he claims. After negotiations with Bumpy on a new price, they both leave his office.

Shaft retires to the “No Name Bar”, across the street from Shaft’s apartment in Greenwich Village. In the bar, he notices two men there who look like the Mafiosi from the pictures Vic showed him, having some drinks while looking at Shaft’s apartment window. Shaft takes over the bar from the bartender, and calls the cops without the two Mafiosi knowing. As the cops arrive to arrest the two men, one of them spits on Shaft’s face to which he responds by breaking a bottle of scotch over the man’s head.

After spending the night with one of the ladies from the bar, Shaft visits Vic and the two mafiaso the following morning. When Shaft returns home, he wakes the woman up, and as she leaves his place, she complains about his rotten manners out of bed, leading to a verbal spat that ends quickly.

A few seconds after the woman leaves, Vic comes in echoing the woman’s spat to Shaft. Vic tells Shaft that the room that he was in at the station house was bugged and he is supposed to bring him in for questioning, but instead leaves. Ben and Shaft go to the apartment where Marcy Jonas is being held to make sure she’s alive. Once there, a gunfight ensues during which two hoods get killed and Shaft takes a bullet in the shoulder. At home where Shaft is getting medical attention from a doctor working underground with him (Shaft refuses to go to any hospital because the hospital will notify police about his gunshot wound.), Shaft tells Ben to round up his men and meet him at the hotel where Marcy has been taken, to prepare to get her back. He also calls Bumpy to tell him that his daughter is fine and he is going to need some taxicabs to meet him at the same hotel for the getaway.

Ben’s men all dress as workers at the hotel (cooks, waiters, elevator operators, etc) as to not arouse suspicion. Shaft and one of Ben’s guys go to the roof and get set up to enter from the window of the room where Marcy is being held captive. Shaft’s plan is to cause a distraction with an explosive thrown through the window of Marcy’s room while Ben and his men come down the hall and deal with the Mafia men as they leave their rooms.

The rescue plan is successful. Marcy is spirited out of the hotel into one of the waiting taxicabs; as the others get away in the remaining cabs, Shaft walks to a phone booth to call Vic. Shaft tells him his “case just busted wide open”, to which Vic tells Shaft to close it for him. Shaft tells Vic that he won’t and declares, “I guess you’re gonna have to close it yourself … shitty!” (referring to the earlier spat with his one-night stand when Shaft asked the woman to close the door on the way out, a remark Vic overheard and teases him with), howling in laughter and walking away as the closing credits roll.

Popularity: 5% [?]

You know you have one too, an awkward family photo happens on occasion.  www.AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com keeps you from having to spend hours looking at your own crappy photos, and the site lets you laugh at other people’s horrible pictures.  Make sure to check them out, as they are this weeks WORST website of the week.  (We mean that in kind of a good way.)

If you like the Worst of the Web weekly update, please “like” it or leave a Facebook comment.  We’ll do them until the end of May and then review your feedback.

Popularity: 20% [?]

Amanda Wenk was a normal teenage girl when she set up her Webshots account in 2004. She decided to post a few s#xy non-nude pictures of herself online, and things got a bit out of hand. Before she knew it, her photos were all over the internet.

The story was used as a case study all over the world, and it pointed to the dangers of posting your photos online.  She was world famous, and she couldn’t stop it. At one point she was the most downloaded person on the net.

Flash forward to 2011, and Ms. Wenk has gone through some changes in life.  Most notably, she has has a breast reduction.  She also went to USC Journalism School.

We hope Ms. Wenk was able to outgrow her image of internet s#x sensation.  Check out her USC Group 14 Project Video, below:

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I love the picture below.  It just makes me laugh that somebody would be so angry that they would want to throw a VCR onto a burning bus.  (I have NEVER been THAT angry.)

Anyway, in celebration of this picture, we’ll be putting a “picture of the day” in the side column from now until May 31.  Depending on the popularity, we may continue.  Hope you enjoy!!!

Popularity: 28% [?]

Who is the Afro-Squad?

    The Squad, also know as the Afro-Squad Army, is a group of people across the world who share a similar distaste for the Man and his nefarious minions.  We enjoy sports, women, sporty women, good humor, and funky cars. 

Who is the Man?

    Here is the simple answer.  The Man is the guy at work that you hate.  He’s the guy who enforces pointless rules.  He is the person who raises your taxes.  He charges you additional fees on your cell phone.  He also keeps you from getting laid.

 Can I join the Afro-Squad

    Yes you can!  We are always looking for funky people to join the ranks of the Afro-Squad Army! 

 How do I join the Afro-Squad?

    There are a bunch of ways!  Grab a ‘fro, wig or similar gimmick and shoot some pictures at a local sporting event.  Even better, make your own Afro-Squad video!  Send it to us and spread the word about the Squad!

Will being in the Afro-Squad get me laid?

    Yes.  Absolutely. 

Why the dark glasses and wigs?

    First off, it is fun to dress up and look goofy.  Second, it helps hide our identity from the Man.  Let’s face it.  The Man is so powerful that he would have a jumbo jet crash in our trailer park if he ever determined our identity. 

What are some common themes within the Afro-Squad?

    A few members really like wrestling.  So you are bound to see the Squad at some wrestling events.  SnowMan and KrazyMan also enjoy White Castle, Photoshop, video editing, and classy ladies.  So you are likely to see those sorts of things too. 

I once saw a website called NinjaPimp Online.  It featured the Afro-Squad.  What was that?

    That was our attempt at a men’s magazine, like Maxim.  We did interviews.  We talked about food, and we crushed the Man. 

Where has the Afro-Squad been?

    We’ve been a lot of places.  The Afro-Squad has appeared at the Superbowl and the World Series.  We’ve been in Paris and Germany.  We’ve been on TV in the US and Australia.  We are all over YouTube, and we may have been in your sister’s bedroom. 

Who are your main members?

    KrazyMan and the SnowMan are the main members of the Squad.  For all intents and purposes, these characters founded the group.  Since then, there have been dozens of supporting characters.  Minor 69′er, Kinky Tuscadero, Jordi Scrubbings, the Afro-Squad Dog, the Gargoyle, the Mullet Master, the Rated R Afro-Star, Original Jit, the Zombie Pimp… and the list goes on. 

Does the Afro-Squad have anything to do with race?

    Nope.  It sure doesn’t.  The Afro-Squad is a group of people of different races who all hate the Man.  It is just that simple.

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According to Google, these are the top clicked terms that people used to find sites in the www.afro-squad.com domain in the past 30 days. Pretty interesting.

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I took some pictures of Ybor city and the graffiti ridden streets.  I thought I would share.

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As you may already know, the team at the Afro-Squad is kind of vain.  SnowMan Jones takes pictures of himself all day long.  KrazyMan is constantly looking at his reflection in his golden gun.  Jordi Scrubbings will talk your ear off if you get a chance.  So every once in a while we google the term “Afrosquad.”

We were angered when we saw somebody using the name Afrosquad on a racist message board titled Chimpout.  Chimpout has nothing to do with the good natured antics of the real Afro-Squad. 

Every once in a while people ask us, “do your afros have anything to do with race?”  The simple answer is no.  They just look funny on our skinny little bodies.  That’s all. 

On a side note, this little chimpanzee reading a paper is pretty cool.  We wish we knew some real chimps.  They are cool when they aren’t eating your fingers. 

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The Mulletmaster recently visited Detroit.  Here are some pictures of the city, down Gratiot.  Comments are welcome. 

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